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Lessons on Love: What I Wish I Knew Years Ago

This article breaks down the hard-learned lessons of daters and lovers so you don't have to fall int the same traps.

ArabLounge Magazine > Dating & Relationships| February 06, 2021

How many of us wish we knew then, what we know now? Concerning love, I'd say that's a lot of us. So many people realize too late in life or through trial and error, the essential lessons on love, dating and relationships. That's why this article is here to break down these hard-won lessons from a variety of serial daters, happy couples, single and happy gals, married couples, people who have had the best and the worst dates, and absolutely everyone in between.

Here are some of the most important and universal things to know about relationships:

Love yourself

Only when you like yourself can other people like you. Be the person you would want to be with. The confidence you exude will attract so many people to you since there's nothing more attractive than a person who is happy with themselves. Find out who you are and begin to love that person.

You probably won't change him/her

People rarely change in the ways you want them to. Face that fact from the beginning and don't hope that one day you may be able to turn them around. Inevitably, you will be disappointed by the lack of changes and resent the person. Cut your losses and realize that if you're already looking to change the person from the very beginning, then it just isn't worth it.

Learn how to be a good cook

This piece of advice is something I've heard over and over again, and it definitely applies to both men and women. For Arabs, a woman who can cook is invaluable and is able to make traditional dishes with ease. For men, it only adds another notch to your belt of skills and makes you that much more attractive. Food is extremely important, and anyone who knows how to whip up a mean baba ghanoush will always score points.

Have the same values

If your values aren't on the same page and you disagree on a lot of fundamental things regarding family, tradition, culture or religion, there may be a bumpy ride for you together in the future. Making sure you talk about what's most important to you and why, will help you gauge how closely together you see things or how different you really are.

Have your own life

Once you're in a relationship, make sure you find time away from each other too. It may sound counter-productive, but having time when you just don't see the other person can actually help bring you closer together. It's more or less about having your own life, interests and experiences, and then coming together at the end of the day to talk to each other about it. Spending every waking moment together can quickly turn annoying so it's important to be independent.


So many relationships have been doomed because of a lack of communication between the partners. Talk to each other, let each other know how you're feeling, take each other's perspectives into account, and make sure they feel as loved by you as much as you can. People aren't mind-readers and they can't possibly know what you think or imply. Be direct yet tactful, and always have an open mind about other viewpoints.

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